I was 5 years old when Cyndi Lauper's Time After Time was a big radio hit. I remember my father and I singing it together in the car as he was driving me back from gymnastics class. (As a side note, this was in 1984, so I was sitting up front on a bench seat with my seat belt on...certainly not in the back strapped to a car seat). When I heard Girls Just Wanna Have Fun for the first time, I was sold. I wanted to be everything like Cyndi Lauper. Her album was titled "She's So Unusual" and she definitely dressed in her own style. One thing that was prominent in her clothing was the use of patterned and textured tights, often fish net. Of course, at this young age I was too young to wear this clothing (or listen to She Bop, I might add), but I never lost my love with those tights. I never wore them as an adult, because their use seemed to be limited to sex shops and hard core punks. Until this year, when I see them filling up every young women's clothing department. Yes, they appear in normal fashion the year that I am diagnosed with vulvodynia, and therefore, unable to comfortably wear tights or pantyhose.
My Hats Off to WeLoveColors.com for introducing a large amount of funky tights, in a thigh-high option. The link will show you the veterical striped thigh highs I purchased, and promptly wore to church today under a grey sweater dress. Whether it was in a good or bad way (I'm still not quite sure at this point) they were noticed, as I did receive a few startled looks and surprised (but kind) comments. Maybe I should have chosen a different Sunday; maybe I should have chose a Sunday when I would not be standing up at the alter to receive Communion. But, no, I did not think that far ahead.
I'm at the front of the church, with a mindset fully focused on prayer, as I note our Reverend walking to each person with the bread in his hands, symbolizing The Body of Christ. Suddenly, I note that increased salivation that I have been getting with my intense cravings starting in my mouth. Here returns that familiar feeling that I am starving! Let's face it, The Communion bread is never that good tasting...unless you are on an elimination diet where grains are strictly forbidden...where just a taste could ruin all the hard work of over a week and a half of eating just sweet potatoes and lamb. So, in front of everyone, in my patterned tights, I turn back to the pews and do not take Communion.
Was this the right decision? I have no clue. It really does not matter to me if a parishioner decides to note that I refused Communion. Our church is really very open minded, loving, and with comparatively less gossipy than of others I have visited (hence, why I love my church). It is just that it seems like God would protect me from an allergic reaction from a Communion offering. Was refusing Communion a show of my lack of faith of God to care for me? I don't know. But, I did pray to Him my concerns, and I'm sure he understands. I know that he must know what I've been struggling with medically these past 10 months.
Here's that link. My color was lavender.
http://www.welovecolors.com/Shop/VerticalStripedThighHighs.htm#
God Bless!
Josie
The Numbers: Food: Today I add in olive oil with orange roughy (That's a deep water fish. I did not know that until yesterday. It's allowed on the Elimination Diet). Breakfast was a fried in extra virgin olive oil sweet potato patty. Lunch was fish, carrots, asparagus. Dinner - lamb, sweet potato, plum, asparagus, carrots, pear (I was hungry). Too weak to complete regular 2.75 mile job without walking. Came inside shaky - had 2 spoonfuls of honey.
Medications: Prosed DS TID, amitriptyline SID, Zytec SID, progesterone SID, gelnique SID
Pain - Urethral a 4 in the morning after 1st urination (likely secondary to difficulty emptying my bladder, but resolved by noon. Vulvodynia noted when using Scrubbing Bubbles - sudden 4 and then disappeared.
Facial buring - a 5 at 8pm. Had changed to neutrogena because face very oily. Will not use tomorrow.
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